JOB BOARD
The Zephyr Air Transport Fleet is ready to serve!
We specialize in deliverying items other firms aren't able to, due to danger, hyper-sensitivity, secrecy concerns, or fictional status. We're also ready and eager to go "off the map!" Trust us with family heirlooms, cursed and/or magical implements, esoteric commodities, and more.
Post your job here and one of our franchisee owner-operator fleet captains will respond as soon as they reach next port. Please specify:
- Pick up location
- Destination
- Type of goods and quantity
Standard rates apply! Submit your job details and our franchisee owner-operators will get the job done. With air-centered delivery professionals available 24/7, delivery has never been more satisfying.
MOST RECENT JOBS
Job - Tankly Howard - 12/16/2025 10:34pm
These tanks are pure fun. Till you get too many and you can't take care of them all. On account of the rhuemetitis and the aurthuritis and all manner of imhumanely aches and pains one gets, whether you're tank-bred or not.
Come and take my tanks! I don't care. I need the money to get my own tank to de-age in, full of that wonderful healing jelly you can breathe right in like it was air, and you get submerged and don't even miss anything when somebody decides to put you on ice, or even out in the field to dry up and blow away.
These tanks are top notch! If a little lived-in. All you need to do is load them up and drop them off at Ol' Habitsform, c/o the Pet Undertaker, and make sure you get a receipt! For all 23 of these Mark II Level 9 Sweet-as-the-day-you-were-born Delux Invenoration Capsules.
Pick them up from the back of my shed, 2200 block of Sherman Street, Puddletown. You just let me know and we'll handshake on it, given you're licensed and bonded.
JOB - Holy Oakes - 5/8/2024 10:23pm
My Krab Men can Kick Rocks!
I built my Krab Men from the instructions on the back of the Krab Men Can label about how to collect enough Krab Men Meat to make a Krab Men Man. I collected enough Krab Men Meat to make a half dozen such Krab Man Men and you'd think they'd be grateful, right? Nooooooo think again! These Krab Man Men didn't want to do a thing around my farm, shoveling cows or milking the hay, they just wanted to play Nintendo all day and that's when I decided they could all kick rocks and get out of my life.
So I've got six Krab Man Men on ice, properly restrained but you're gonna wanna keep 'em froze till they reach the mythical destination of Krab Men Island which I just cooked up, because there ain't so such place. Your instructions are to take these six Krab Men out into the middle of the ocean and dump 'em out. Those Krab Men can fend for themselves because I ain't gonna.
Standard airhipping rates apply. And let me tell ya -- you better keep 'em chilled!
JOB - Harper Bailey - 5/8/2024 10:14pm
I've got a bunch of sad thoughts that need to be taken away. They're all over the floor of my room and through the hallway and down into the basement. Some are even outside, sopping wet.
Collecting these thoughts and disposing of them safely is what I need. It's important to know they will be treated well on their final journey -- kept warm, and dry, and well-fed, with an array of fruit juices and shortbread and cozy blankets and perhaps red velvet pillows with golden tassels for them to rest on during their journey.
And just how will you be disposing of them? Your method must be humane and thoughtful and environmentally safe. Please contact me directly by accepting this job to discuss method and terms.